Rossmylife

My life's history

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Just blogging on life in general and who i am.

  • The final hit

    Well it’s been an adventure. I believe that I have gotten my final hit. Having said it before on a blog and saying now. I am done with relationships. I lived alone for a long time not looking for someone. When a person starts to not communicate with you, it’s a sign of ending it now .

    I have thought this thru, no second guessing. Their actions are something I have seen before.. Do not really have bad feelings for them, it’s their decision. Just hope they will be totally honest. About it. Doesn’t say that I will not try to change their feelings to talk things out. If you don’t try you won’t know, if it is just a second thougt or their mind ia made up.

    I know people will say that it was too quite to have those feelings so fast. Be if you never take the chance then , you will never know. So I say goodbye for now does not mean I am d8nish with my life blog.

  • Is it true or not.

    We all wish for certain things to happen, but are we blinded by hopes and dreams. People come into your life and you think this feels right. But is it, are you setting yourself up for disappointment. That is the question that haunts us. Is this truly right or just a wish that you hoped would happen.

    At first everything seams wonderful , new relationship becomes intense. Thinking this is what you have been waiting for. As time goes on your mind goes into a wake up call. Rethinking everything said, done and reaction that have happen. Rethinking is this for real or just a game.

    So we step back and evaluate everything, is there something off. Is there a change in actions from them. Doubt starts to overtake our mind. Your heart says one thing but your mind is having issues. Certain things in the back of your mind tell you to stop everything and get your stuff together. They ask for something the seams off in the back of your mind. Questioning their true intentions in your mind.

    Is it time to walk away or speak your mind. Which i do even if makes me look foolish. Putting so much into this relationship and now questioning it .Thinking maybe I was a fool and was blinded by hope. Well I think that I should hold back to rethink this, taking the hit again. Too many hits already and say I am done with people in general. ( read my past to understand the hit issue)

    Will I regret my decision. Losing something that is truly real. So today I will question myself and find the truth of it. Even if I lose this person at my own stupidity. Wish me luck.

  • Are they tell you the truth

    How do you know if they are telling the truth? Ask them a question about themselves. Let time past then ask same question saying you that you missed something in their answer. Is the answer the same? People always remember truth, but lies always have a little different answer each time. I have always said communication is the best way to keep things open and fresh. It let’s the other person know without them trying to guess.

    Or do you do an internet search on them, even a background check. The internet is not your friend, it could be false. Or they are victims of stolen identity. ( which is easy to do with modern technical knowledge). So the old way of investigating has to happen, questions,their actions, the tone in there voice with the answer. Or hesitation in the answer. If you do a background check then rethink this relationship. Because you have already doubted them.

    All in all go slowly into a new relationship. Making sure the person is truly who they say they are. Too many have been catfished nowadays. Always ask what you need to ask, if in doubt say so. They may not like it, but if you are serious and say why, it’s their lost.

  • Is it that time now

    To my disbelief my world has turned upside down. Saying her heart is open for me to enter. Then saying, you haven’t ask me to be your your girlfriend. Well last I thought was she need time for the relationship to grow. What do you do now, In my heart I do want to ask her for one on one relationship (hence girlfriend- boyfriend relationship). So I just could ask now but she still brought up the question.

    Thinking now, this is a prediction of our relationship turning the corner. I had to ask the question but state it in different words. (Back to the words post again. ) I ask if you would be my love and companion. Then she says can I think more about it. Boom, my heart steps back. I know she wants it to happen but is still afraid. We know we are both ready for this next step.

    So here I am sitting and waiting for the answer. Little puzzled by her answer since she brought it up. What is my next move, let it be or question her response. How do I get myself into these situations. How do I remain calm and not say anything. I can’t and I don’t know what will happen next. Still unsure why she has doubts even when she says things differently. She knows where I come from in life matters. She agrees with them.

    Worst part now is that I can not look her in eyes because is is out of town for work. To me, the person’s eyes says alot when you have anything to say. So,it is wait time which will be the death of me.

  • Does the other person understand your words

    Where do I start here. In English, the same word can have too many meanings. Trying to get people to understand which meaning is the hard part. This is so true in writing your words down instead of saying them. Yes there are Symptoms that help alot, you just got to know how to use them.

    When talking in person, it about how you say it and the tone in your voice. My problem sometimes stems from not raising my voice or tone. Have always been a soft spoken person. People often miss my meaning in the conversation.. So for me symptoms work better. So, now i have to reassure that my words are understood.

    To say I love you to someone can have two meanings. It can be love from the heart or love from caring. Same as the words love you back. Two meanings can come from this. Or the Love Ya words. What love are you talking about. You have to express this with addition words involved.

    So as you write, say words to another person, always make sure that they know the understanding what the meaning is behind it. Mistakes can happen and life can be ruined by the misunderstanding of those words. I personally have had this happen and hope in this present relationship i don’t screw up.

    Now I am upfront by saying if I use the words I Love You. That is from my heart and soul. And to say Love Ya is saying I care in general. I have not used the three words I Love You but to a very few people. The ones that have my heart and soul. That also means my children too.

    Hope this can help other people besides me to make sure your words either by writing or saying are clear to that other person either a friend or loved one. Last words to my love now is. I AM IN LOVE WITH YOU from the bottom of my heart.

  • Thinking if this is a mistake.

    How do you remove doubt in decision that will change your life. Do you just take that chance and hope for the best. Or do back away and hope that if it is real you don’t hurt someone. Being that honestly is the key of all relationship. The doubt still holds true. Hoping that this person is true in their heart also. Wishing that it could be easy to truly know. I know that for myself I can not lie or give false hope to another person.

    Your mind is your worst enemy, saying that in general. It can lead you to false fear of the situation. I believe in this person’s saying the truth and is all in for this relationship. I have totally given myself to them. This keeps me hoping and wishing it does not end. I know they may still have doubts, I wish I could reassure them on everything 😢.

    But time will tell, just have to tell my brain to stop overthinking everything. And patiently wait and give them the time they need for this relationship to come into full commitment if that is what they want. So, to my brain stop and rest, if it is another hit in my life then it happens. I can live my life as i have been, just no more putting my heart. body,soul and mind out there.

  • The connection

    How do you know if the connection is real or fake. You can ask a question and get an answers. But are the answers true! That is a hard call, thinking this out you realize that maybe ask the same question but in different words. Now! You see if they are real or not. How far do you go in this new connection to think of continuing it.

    That can only be answered by what your soul says. And that could be riding the fence for a time. Asking yourselves if the answers line up or are they off. Or they hesitate answering back. Only to hear in time as they answered. If the connection is real in their heart there should be no hesitation or in time answer. To be open to a new person shows alot of character. No, you don’t have to give personal information, but an answer of your beliefs and feelings about the question in mind.

    But there is a catch to it all, you are told something that you would never believe. Now the mystery begins. They have been holding this back from you because they are afraid of you not accepting or think you will think of them differently. What do you do now, either accept it or say you need time to think it out. You must decide that from inside yourself and be up front and truthful to this person. Honestly and what comes from heart goes a long way.

    I have been a person that is upfront, honest say what I want even if the other person may get upset. But they know where I come from and stand. This has happen to me, got an answer that thru me into a loop. Given her the benefit of the doubt. I had a hard decision to make and make it fast. Do I continue this new relationship or do I step away saying I have a problem with it. Well I stayed and realized she just opened up to me honestly. In my mind i think it makes this relationship stronger.

    The bond between has now reached a new level on our feelings and thoughts about the future. But, we both still believe that this relationship will get strong and better as we talk more. Words sometimes are more powerful then action. It should be a balance between them, words last for ever, Action do not. Listen to your partner remember the little things even if they are small.That is the way to communicate.

    So as I go down this new path with hope. I realized that if you don’t take the chance, you maybe lose it. Lose something that could bring happiness into my life. A new beginning with an old soul like me. If you have read my life history you will understand, is this another test or my reward for hope in my life. Either way, I must take the chance.

  • My connection to a new life

    https://rossmylife.com/2025/05/21/my-connection-to-a-new-life/?page_id=27

    Is it real or false hope

    How do you start a new relationship if the other person is there to begin something temporary. At first you have doubts, then things progress to where your doubts are in the past,. Only to find out they are using you as a temporary love until their true love shows up. The gap filler is what I call it, They need to be with someone so they are not lonely. Then their so called true one comes along, Now telling you it’s not working out between you.. Do you say to yourself that It was my fault knowing i had these doubts in the beginning of the relationship..

    Or do you just roll over and play dead, And think I was a fool in the first place. It’s a mystery each time you begin a new relationship. Just remember that talking to the new interest can be the answer. Never be afraid to ask questions even if the answer hurts. Honest goes a long way, if they are not honest or really answer the question right away. Maybe it’s time to rethink this relationship.

  • Do you believe in spirits

    That is a big subject that people debate. Having a ancestor that do believe spirits are watching over you. Mind you my ancestors are Cherokee Indian. I have had the same thing that happens when I feel an uncertainty about a life decision.Talking with my grandmother’s sisters i was asked what repeats it’s self each time. I stated that I find dimes in unusual ways, walk through a area and return right after, there is a dime laying there. Even when I have just turn to open a desk draw, I look back. Boom a dime laying on the desk. ( note every dime found was heads up with the same date. ) the date you ask is my daughter’s birth year. This has been happening since my daughter was killed.

    Grandmother’s sisters tell me it’s my daughter who is my spirit watching over me. Letting me know that my decision is right. Well to say it runs in the family, grandmother’s sisters made a dream catcher for my daughter when she born. It hung in her window the whole time. At the time of her death, I asked for it back. And hung in my bedroom, that’s when all the dime finds started to happen.

    Each time a big decision was being made a dime shows up and feel my spirit saying that the decision I made was right. Now coming present time i have a big change in my life. Have not been interested in dating since wife passed away. Has been 7 years. Someone comes into my life from out of no where. Never thought this person was interested in me until we started talking. Well this started feeling right, her words about it came out first. As we keep talking about know each other better before any true relationship would happen. Things started to fall in place, saying that we each wanted to slowing figure it out. Now boom she says she has grown more attached to me. Well I then admitted the she does have a part of my heart and soul, but my my mind said different. She admitted feeling the same.

    Now while my mind is in a state of confusion. What do i find, a dime sitting on the table. Was not there a minute ago. Yep, heads up daughter’s birth year. Then that inter feeling came from her. Saying that this person in truly the right person and this person feels the same way. So the next day as we were talking i said that my heart and soul has taken over my mind and admitted to my feelings. At the same time she admitted the same. Still saying we will not rush into it.

    I have yet to tell her about having this visions with my daughter’s spirit. But we agree that as we talk. That we are not holding anything back and up front with everything. Holding no judgment on past or anything present. Believing that we would remain friends even if the relationship does not work. So today I will tell her, about my daughter’s spirit watching over both of us. Hoping she does not run away from this bit of information. I think she will be a ok with it. Reassuring that my mind to follow my heart and soul came from my true feelings.

    Wish me luck. Unknown if the other person has read this first. 🤔

    Beyond the Obstacle

  • Is this real or fantasy

    New relationship happens, what do you do ? Rethink your life and hope it is right. They started this connection. Saying they are interested in me, by the way of how i have chatted with them. being up front and state how I feel and think. Holding nothing back. Her barriers slowly go down little by little. With her saying she has become attached to me because I say the truth. Both agree that we would like to slowly build the relationship. Well it happens, I told her how I feel about us. She still has worries. Asking to see my chat list to see if I was only interested in her. Showed her without hesitation. Boom she is in for moving the relationship up with to a little more intensely. But still agree to move slowly. But I still have this question in the back of my mind. Why me, I am quite a bit older than her. Was up front with that at beginning. Now, i feel this could work out with us, now my mind is all over the place.

    https://rossmylife.com/2025/05/21/beyond-the-obstacle/?page_id=7